Time travel hurts my head

Potential Spoilers Below

Lann the Clever

Lann the Clever is the legendary hero from the Age of Heroes that founded House Lannister.

While House Lannister is of mostly Andal descent, Lann is believed to have been descended from the First Men. Some versions of his tale state he was an Andal adventurer from across the Narrow Sea.

Tyrion travels across the Narrow Sea

Lann is popular amongst singers and storytellers. In some tales of the Reach, Lann was a bastard born either to Florys the Fox or to Rowan Gold-Tree, while in the Westerlands it is more often said that Lann deceived Garth Greenhand by posing as one of his sons - Garth having so many that he couldn't recognize he wasn't one - and making off with part of the inheritance that belonged to Garth's children. One popular story tells how he supposedly swindled Casterly Rock from the Casterlys using nothing but his wits. In another tale he is said to have stolen gold from the sun to brighten his hair. Some claim that Lann still haunts the castle.

I believe Tyrion to be the son of the Mad King and Joanna Lannister - making him technically a bastard

Tyrion Lannister
Lann the Clever

Stories differ in the method by which he took Casterly Rock. In the most common version of the tale Lann discovered a secret way into the Rock, a cleft so narrow he had to strip naked and coat himself in butter in order to squeeze himself through. 

A secret way into the Rock

 

 

Once inside he began to whisper threats in the ears of sleeping Casterlys, howling from the darkness like a demon, stealing treasures from one brother and placing them in the bedchamber of another, rigging snares and deadfalls. Thus, he set the Casterlys at odds with one another and convinced them their seat was haunted.

Not quite a whisper but close enough

One brother stealing treasures from another

In other version of the tale, Lann used that very same cleft to fill the Rock with mice, rats and other vermin to drive the Casterlys out. In yet another he smuggles a pride of lions inside, and Lord Casterly and his sons are all devoured, after which Lann claimed Lord Casterly's wife and daughters for himself. In the bawdiest tales, Lann steals in at night to have his way with the Casterly maidens in their sleep, and nine months later, these maids give birth to golden-haired children whilst insisting they had never had carnal knowledge of any man.

The bawdy tale

Archmaester Perestan proposed that Lann must have been a retainer in service of House Casterly who impregnated the lord's daughter - or daughters - and persuaded the father to give him the girl in marriage. Yandel considers that if this lord had no trueborn sons, then in the natural course of events the Rock then passed to said daughter, and hence Lann, upon the father's death. Whatever the case, House Casterly suddenly vanishes from chronicles and histories and in its place appears the hitherto-unknown House Lannister.

Lann supposedly lived to the age of 312, and sired a hundred bold sons and a hundred lissome daughters, all fair of face, clean of limb and with hair "as golden as the sun". In a few generations, Lann's descendants were so numerous that even Casterly Rock can't contain them all. The members of the lesser branches make their home in a nearby village that eventually grows into town and then a city: Lannisport.

The Rat Cook

The Rat Cook was an infamous member of the Night's Watch.

According to legend, the man who would later be known as the Rat Cook was a simple cook at the Nightfort. He became infamous when he served an Andal king (identified either as King Tywell II of the Rock or King Oswell I of the Vale) a pie that was made of bacon and, unknown to the king, the king's son. The cook killed the prince in revenge for a wrong the king supposedly did to him. The king was unaware of this, however, as he ate and praised the taste and asked for a second piece. 

Black Walder and Lothar baked in a pie

The gods were angered — not because the cook had committed murder, nor because he had made the king a cannibal — but because the cook had slain a guest beneath his roof. They cursed the cook and transformed him into a massive rat who was doomed to be unable to eat anything but his own young.

The crime

Eating his own young

According to the story, the Rat Cook is an enormous white rat who still lives in the Nightfort today, and all the other rats that inhabit the Nightfort are his descendants.

Such is the infamy of the tale that there is a song about the Rat Cook that is still sung in the Seven Kingdoms, despite the fact that this incident was supposed to have happened hundreds of years before Aegon's Landing. The song is used to represent the repercussions to those who violate guest right, the sacred laws of hospitality.

So what does it all mean?

So, did this happen in the past or as I now think it happened in the here and now and Bran who is the 3-eyed crow takes the tales back to the past with him.  I believe that Bran will somehow transport his physical body back to the past and create all the famous legends that their world knows as well as the famous Brans that his world knows.  I believe at one point we will see Bran reading to a young girl who will one day become Old Nan and he is going to ask her to remember and read those same stories back to every Bran in the Winterfell Household ensuring that he remembers.  For some reason, the only story that Bran can’t see the end of is the Battle for the Dawn which I believe is the coming “Great War”.  For that same reason he doesn’t know or can’t see the outcome thus the reason why we never hear what Azor Ahai actually did to end the Long Night.  The story however is meant as a source of hope but nothing says the outcome will be a joyful one. Like in The Wheel of Time: The Prophecies said he was the only chance. They did not say he would win.

The part about Lann living to the age of 312 hopefully is an omen that Tyrion makes it out of this thing alive.

Comments encouraged.  Love to hear the ideas of others.  Most believe that since I present my idea’s as “fact like” I’m not open to change my viewpoints which is far from the truth.  I simply look at the information presented and go from there.  If you can shine a light on another way of thinking that opens the door to debate.